Here is Rachels's year-end sign off with some of her silliest moments, take a look...
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Art Below.org.uk is looking for LGBT artists who are interested in getting involved with Pride House London which will be launched next summer. For more information 'like' their facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/PrideHouseLDN and email them at firstname.lastname@example.org
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
In a recent news story, a 7 year old boy, Bobby Montoya, is not only trying to live as a girl, he also wants to join Girl Scouts. Check out this video, it is a very interesting story.
Monday, October 10, 2011
As many in the LGBT community already know, October 11 is a very special day for us...it is National Coming Out Day.
Founded in 1988 by Robert Eichberg and Jean O'Leary, marking the anniversary of the 1987 march on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights. Since then, NCOD has become an internationally recognized day of celebration for the LGBT community and their allies.
Robert Eichberg, who died in 1995 of complications from AIDS, said in a 1992 interview, "Most people think they don't know anyone gay or lesbian, and in fact everybody does. It is imperative that we come out and let people know who we are and disabuse them or their fears and stereotypes."
And this year, we have many LGBT successes to celebrate; DADT has finally been repealed and now Gay & lesbian couples can legally get married in New York...these are huge steps. I know we still have a long way to go, but for tomorrow, lets take the time and be grateful for what we have accomplished...and let that jo spill out for the year ahead!
So, on October 11th, 2011 where ever you may be, let those you know & love, family members, friends, maybe even a stranger, know who you are… and that you are proud. No matter if you're lesbian, gay, transgender, bisexual, or a straight alliance member, stand up and be proud!
Thursday, August 25, 2011
On August 26, 1920, after a difficult 72-year-long battle, U.S. Secretary of State Bainbridge Colby signed the 19th Amendment into law and women in the United States were allowed to vote.
In 1971, Congress designated August 26 National Women's Equality Day after passing a bill introduced by U.S. Rep. Bella Abzug.
And just yesterday, in a proclamation published by the White House, President Obama stated, "I call upon the people of the United States to celebrate the achievements of women and recommit ourselves to the goal of gender equality in this country..."
"The 19th Amendment to the United States Constitution tore down the last formal barrier to women's enfranchisement in our Nation and empowered America's women to have their voices heard in the halls of power."
"On the 91st anniversary of this landmark in civil rights, we continue to uphold the foundational American principles that we are all equal, and that each of us deserves a chance to pursue our dreams."
And although I believe there are still some areas where women are not treated equally, such as in the workplace, we have still come a long way and have a lot to celebrate.
So Happy "Women's Equality Day" to all!
Friday, August 12, 2011
I found this article today at the Salt Lake Tribune website, since I know there are quite a few lesbians that live or have lived in Utah, I thought you all might find this one interesting.
Poll: Support, acceptance of gays is growing in Utah
by Rosemary Winters
The Salt Lake Tribune
Most Utahns would be bothered to learn that their own child or grandchild is gay. But, by a large margin, they support protecting gay and transgender people from discrimination in housing, employment and public accommodations.
That’s according to a poll released Thursday by the Human Rights Campaign, which kicks off a national bus tour in Salt Lake City on Friday to promote civil rights for the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) population.
Utahns have warmer feelings toward gay and lesbian people than they do toward President Barack Obama. (Gay and lesbian people received an average 51 points out of 100, and Obama received an average 38 points.)
Seventy percent of respondents said they know someone who is gay or lesbian. And 42 percent said their feelings about LGBT people have become more accepting over the last five to 10 years. (Seven percent said they have become less accepting.) Nearly 70 percent of men and 77 percent of women said they could be close friends with a gay or lesbian person. More than half, 55 percent, said they would be bothered "a great deal" to learn their child or grandchild is gay.
Utahns remain strongly opposed to gay marriage — 63 percent are opposed and 30 percent are in favor. They also are divided over allowing gay and lesbian couples to adopt children (44 percent in favor and 48 percent opposed).
The issue of anti-gay discrimination has received heightened attention in Utah since 2009, when Salt Lake City approved ordinances that forbid housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity — and won a landmark endorsement from the LDS Church. Another 11 cities and counties adopted similar ordinances the following year. But the Utah Legislature has snubbed attempts to pass a statewide law.
More than three-fourths of Utahns (77 percent) support anti-discrimination protections, the poll found.
"Salt Lake City is a fitting place to kick off this [bus] tour as Utahns believe in fairness but the laws haven’t yet caught up with that reality," HRC President Joe Solmonese said in a statement. Solmonese will be at the Utah Pride Center on Friday to launch the 12-week tour, which mostly will stop at cities in the Midwest and South.
Greenberg Quinlan Rosner Research, commissioned by HRC, surveyed 400 Utah adults between Aug. 2 and 3. The poll carries a margin of error of plus or minus 4.9 percentage points
Monday, June 20, 2011
- What do you think are the biggest health issues facing lesbian women today?
- Do you think that the lesbian community as a whole is more or less health conscious?
- Do you think lesbians are more accepting of women who are overweight?
- Do you think lesbians have more or less stress in their lives then our straight counterparts? And if so, why?
- How long do you think the average lesbian relationship lasts?
- What do you think are some of the most common problems lesbians face in long-term relationships?
- Do you think lesbians tend to get into more "unhealthy" relationships than straight women?
- Have you ever had a commitment ceremony, marriage or otherwise (this does include Domestic Partners), in any of your relationships? And if you have, how many times total?
- At what age did you start dating women?
- At what age did you tell your family that you're a lesbian?
That is all for today. Thank you in advance for helping me with this survey.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
In a recent email from Equality California it was announced that U.S. District Court Judge James Ware ruled that former U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker did not have to recuse himself from the federal case against Proposition 8 just because he is gay.
If Judge Ware had decided that Judge Walker should have removed himself from hearing the case because of his sexual orientation, Judge Walker’s ruling in 2010 that Prop. 8 is unconstitutional could have been overturned. It also would have set a dangerous precedent for many judges in the US. Female judges could have been barred from hearing cases that affect women. African American, Latino and Asian American judges could have been barred from hearing cases that affect their own ethnicity and so on. This ruling reaches beyond the LGBT community and is a cause for celebration for all Americans who believe in equality.
So now it is up to the California Supreme Court, which will hear arguments in the case against Prop. 8 in September of this year. Then the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals will consider the findings of the California Supreme Court and make its own ruling on Prop. 8, probably in the beginning of 2012.
As more information and details become available, I will be sure to post more updates. You can also stay caught up on prop 8 by following Equality California on Facebook and Twitter.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Now get ready to CELEBRATE!!!!
Saturday, April 16, 2011 Miami Beach Gay Pride
May 21-22, 2011, Long Beach, CA, Long Beach Pride
May 26-29, 2011 Washington DC Black Pride
May 28-June 5, 2011, Winnepeg, Manitoba Winnipeg Pride
May 30-June 5, 2011 , Kansas City, MO, Kansas City Gay Pride
June 2-12, 2011 Washington, DC Capital Pride
Jun 3-4, 2011, Austin, TX, Austin Pride
June 3-5, 2011, Salt Lake City, UT Utah Pride
Jun 3-12, 2011 Boston, MA, Boston Pride
Jun 4, 2011, Honolulu, HI, Honolulu Pride Parade
Jun 4, 2011, Sacramento,CA Sacramento Pride
Jun 5, 2011, Guerneville, CA, Sonoma County Pride
Jun 5, 2011, Charleston, WV, Rainbow Pride of West Virginia
Jun 8-12, 2011, Key West, FL, Key West Pride
Jun 9-11, 2011, Albuquerque, NM Albuquerque Pride
Jun 10-12, 2011, Los Angeles, CA, LA Pride
Jun 10-12, 2010, Milwaukee, WI, Pridefest
Jun 10-13, 2011, Des Moines, IA, Des Mines Capital City Pride
Jun 11, 2011, Tulsa, OK, Tulsa Pride
Jun 11, 2011, Columbus, OH, Columbus Pride
Jun 11, 2011, Erie, PA, Pride Picnic
Jun 11, 2011, San Antonio, TX, Pridefest, SA
Jun 11, 2010, Spokane, WA, Spokane Pride Parade & Rainbow Festival
Jun 12, 2011, Philadelphia, PA, Philadelphia Pride Day
Jun 12, 2011, Huntington, Long Island, NY, Long Island Pride Parade
Jun 12, 2011, Columbia, MO, Mid-Missouri Pride Festival
Jun 12-13, 2011, Pittsburgh, PA, Pittsburgh Pride
Jun 12-19, 2011, Portland, ME, Southern Maine Pride Parade & Festival
Jun 17-18, 2011, Louisville, KY, Kentuckiana Pride Festival
Jun 17-19, 2011, Kalispell, MT, Montana Pride in Kalispell
Jun 18, 2011, Boise, ID, Boise Pride
Jun 18, 2011, Flagstaff, AZ, Pride in the Pines
Jun 18, 2011 Grand Rapids, MI, West Michigan Pride
Jun 18, 2011, Nashville, TN, Nashville Pride
Jun 18, 2011, Providence, RI, Rhode Island PrideFest
Jun 18, 2011 Syracuse, NY, CNY Pride
Jun 18-19, 2011, Denver, CO Denver Pridefest
Jun 18-19, 2011, Portland, OR, Pride Northwest Portland
Jun 18-26, 2011, Anchorage, AK, Anchorage Pride
Jun 24-Jul 3, 2011, Toronto, Canada, Toronto Pride
Jun 24-25, 2011, Chicago, Chicago Pride
Jun 24-26, 2011, Columbia, SC, South Carolina Black Pride
Jun 24-26, 2010, Oklahoma City, OK, Oklahoma City Pride
Jun 24-27, 2011, New Orleans, New Orleans Pride
Jun 25, 2011, Cleveland, OH, Cleveland Gay Pride Fest
Jun 25, 2011, Houston, TX, Houston Pride
Jun 25, 2011,Tampa Bay, FL, Tampa/St. Pete Pride
Jun 25-26, 2011, Minneapolis, Minneapolis/St.Paul Pride
Jun 25-26, 2011, New York, NY, New York City Pride
Jun 25-26, 2011, San Francisco, CA, San Francisco Pride
Jun 25-26, 2011 Seattle, WA, Seattle Pride
Jun 25-26, 2011, St. Louis, MO, St. Louis PrideFest
Jul 9, 2011 in Monterey, CA, Pride of Monterey County
Jul 15-17, 2011, Charlotte, SC, Charlotte Black Gay Pride
Jul 15-17, 2011, San Diego, CA, San Diego Pride
Jul 16-17, 2011, Colorado Springs, CO, Colorado Springs PrideFest
Jul 23, 2011, Burlington, VT, Pride Vermont Parade
July 31, 2011,Vancouver, Canada, Vancouver Pride
Aug 9-14, 2011, Montreal, Canada, Montreal Pride
Aug 13, 2011, Eugene, OR, Eugene/Springfield Pride Festival
Aug 20, 2011, Edgewater, MD, Chesapeake Pride Festival
Aug 20, 2011, Reno, NV, Reno Pride
Aug 20-21, 2011, San Jose, CA, San Jose Pride
Sep 4, 2011, Oakland / East Bay, Oakland Pride, Oakland Pride
Sep 17, 2011, Hartford, CT, Connecticut Pride
Sep 17, 2011, Modesto, CA, Modesto Stanislaus Pride
Sep 24, 2011, Raleigh-Durham, NC Pride Parade and Festival
Oct 15, 2011, Memphis, TN, Mid-South Pride
Monday, March 28, 2011
By Judy Kinney, Lesbian Life Coach I join with ALL those who are committed to peace.
I have said it a zillion times- joy is our natural state of being. Still, I understand that joy can seem illusive or disrespectful at times. Recently, people have asked me,
How do I create my own life, be sensitive to those around me, AND help create this world of ours?
Central to this question is our ability to be sovereign beings in relationship with others. I believe that joy may be our conduit to developing this essential skill. Feeling good is a very personal experience, yet I believe it may be impossible to feel joy and feel isolated from life and all its glory.
This idea may be easy enough to understand, but now, let's reconnect to this issue of suffering and distress.
First, let me say that I believe that it is our reaction to the event, not the event itself that creates our suffering. I sometimes struggle with this belief, but it still guides me.
You may have seen this for yourself when two people experience the same event and have completely different reactions. I am seeing this a lot these days. Some people lose their job and are happy, others are miserable. I have read that some people in Japan are experiencing an increased sense of connection, community and power since the recent tsunami. I am sure that you have read of people facing incurable diseases who are happier than they have ever been in their life.
Still, while suffering is a part of our common human experience, it never feels good. You know as well as I do-feeling bad because someone else feels bad only creates more bad feelings. Within each of us there is the desire to connect and be apart of something bigger than our self AND a fundamental desire to feel good.
A lot of people are feeling lost in a chasm between joy and distress these days. Intellectually, joy may sound good, but how do any of us make a discernible difference?
I have developed a practice called iJoin, that helps people turn sorrow into joy. This practice helps heal the sorrow and the distress you are experiencing or perceiving in the world.
iJoin is an adaptation of the Buddhist idea of sympathetic joy. Sympathetic joy, or mudita, is joy in the fundamental goodness of all beings, especially the pleasure that comes from delighting in rather than begrudging others’ well being
There are a couple ways to work with the practice of iJoin. You can use iJoin when you want relief from your own despair, frustration, or hopelessness. You can also use this practice as a form of prayer for others who are suffering.
How it works.
For example, rather than ranting, feeling powerless or ignoring the US entering into yet another war, I find the joy that I am seeking-peace. Rather than praying for others to change, I say this statement of prayer before going to bed or as I come across war-related news.
This statement aligns my energy with the millions of people who also value peace. Note that I am not engaging in a conversation about the right or wrong way to obtain peace. Instead, I am tapping into and feeding a common human desire for peace. As I express my iJoin statement, I feel connected to MILLIONS of people. I am directing my energy to expand peace in my life and in the world.
When I get nervous about my coaching business, I say,
I join with ALL those who are thriving while courageously creating their life.
And suddenly I feel a surge of confidence. As I think about other people's suffering, I also imagine their joy.
For my friend who has a lot of job worry and despair, I say,
I join with Sara in her desire to have a vibrant, welcoming, and well-paying job this year.
For those living in Japan, I say,
I join with ALL those who are creating an ever more vibrant Japan.
For those who are afraid of change and take it out on others, I say,
I join with all those who find their powerful heart even in the midst of fear.
iJoin is a form of prayer, but instead of fixing something or feeling hopeless, you tap into the goodness, joy, and power that already exists in your heart and in each of us.
I will be exploring this topic further on my Facebook page. Stop by with questions and let me know what you're experiencing through your iJoin practice.
I join with ALL those who are committed to peace.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Vito Russo Award
Outstanding Drama Series
Outstanding Digital Journalism - Multimedia
"Bridal Bliss: Aisha and Danielle" by Bobbi Misick
Outstanding Individual Episode (in a series without a regular LGBT character)
"Klaus & Greta"
30 Rock (NBC)
Outstanding Talk Show Episode
"Ricky Martin Coming Out as a Gay Man and a New Dad" The Oprah Winfrey Show (syndicated)
Outstanding TV Journalism - Newsmagazine
"Gay Teen Suicides" (series) Anderson Cooper 360 (CNN)
Outstanding Newspaper Article
"Rutgers Student Tyler Clementi's Suicide Spurs Action Across U.S." by Judy Peet (The Star-Ledger Newark, N.J.)
Outstanding Newspaper Columnist
Frank Rich (The New York Times)
Outstanding Newspaper Overall Coverage
Outstanding Magazine Article
"What Happens When You Find the One...And He's Nothing – Nothing – Like You Expected?" by Allison Cooper (O, The Oprah Magazine)
Outstanding Magazine Overall Coverage
Outstanding Digital Journalism Article
"View From Washington" (series) by Kerry Eleveld (Advocate.com)
Outstanding Digital Journalism - Multimedia
"Bridal Bliss: Aisha and Danielle" by Bobbi Misick (Essence.com)
Joe. My. God.
Outstanding Comic Book
X-Factor by Peter David (Marvel Comics)
Outstanding Los Angeles Theater
Something Happened by L. Trey Wilson
Outstanding New York Theater: Broadway & Off-Broadway
When Last We Flew by Harrison David Rivers
For more info, check out their website at http://www.glad.org/
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Today, Senator Dianne Feinstein introduced legislation to repeal the so-called “Defense of Marriage Act” (DOMA) once and for all. She was joined by her colleagues Sens. Leahy, Gillibrand, Blumenthal and Coons. She has opposed DOMA since 1996 and she believes it’s time to erase this stain from our history books once and for all.
Last month, President Obama and Attorney General Holder announce that DOMA is unconstitutional and indefensible. But with Speaker Boehner moving to intervene in the courts, it’s high time we begin our fight in Congress.
While the Prop 8 case winds its way through the courts and DOMA remains on the books, same-sex couples will continue to be denied the right to marry. In California, home to one of the largest populations of same-sex couples, Senator Feinstein believes that we can do something about it.
As a member of the Judiciary Committee, she is going to step up to represent her constituents and fill that role. But it will still be a long, hard slog.
Sign up for her campaign to repeal DOMA. Then, ask 5 friends to do the same. We don't take these efforts lightly, and know that we need to build a mass movement that can make calls, write letters, and mobilize your fellow citizens at a moment’s notice if we’re going to win this battle.
Click here to add your name to the list and stay informed.
Monday, March 14, 2011
FALLING IN LOVE IN SIX ACTS
A passion play
(Or what happens when you fall down that long well of passion
over a person, a place, a sport, a game, a belief, and your heart goes boom and your mind leaves town.)
(I think I love you. Who are you anyway?)
Here it is, the big "Wow," the big "Gee," the big "YesYesYes" you've been waiting for. This is where you find something or someone and believe they are better, greater, cuter, wiser, more wonderful than anything you have ever known. Lust isn't a sin, it's a necessity, for with lust as our guide we imagine our bodies moving the way our bodies were meant to move: we can do marathons with our feet, lift pounds with our arms, have stars in our eyes and do a nifty tango. And you think: I have no need of food, I have no need of sleep, I have no needs other than occasionally chewing a breath mint. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, probably because you haven't happened to me yet. Now I can pass into the next Act, so poetically called:
(Or: Oh Yippee, you're mine.)
You feel funny inside. You feel funny outside. You feel you could do anything and no one would dare laugh at you. This love, you will treasure. You will not put it in the basement next to your rowing machine, treadmill, and thermal body sweat wrap. And you will not take this love for granted, because that is the biggest sin of all. And you say: I feel so good, I feel so strong, I feel actually attractive and I could learn to live with that feeling. Oh let us sing and dance and eat brown mushy foods low in fat! Oh joy! Oh rapture! ----- Oh but what if I'm no good at this? Oh I am no good at this. I am a dingy speck on the wall of humanity and look how badly painted that wall is! I am becoming very, very afraid. That must be because I'm passing into the Third Act, called:
(Also known as: Uh-oh.)
This is where the doubt begins, where the mind comes back from shopping, yells at the heart, binds and gags it to a nice lounge chair and allows guilt, failure, and remembrances of things past to sit in for a nice game of bridge. This is where you fear what you need most. If it's a person you love, you fear appearing foolish in front of them. If it's a sport, you fear being foolish in front of many, many people at the same time. And you begin to think: oh no. What if I'm wrong? What if this stinks? What if my heart has blinders on, it's had blinders on before, in fact it had dark heavy patches taped all over it. How can anyone love me if I don't love myself? I mean, I love myself, there are just parts between the top of my head and the bottom of my feet that could use some improvement. I'm not demeaning myself, I have relatives who do that.
(And the strange desire to eat everything in sight,
hide in your room, and watch old Gidget movies with friends from high school.)
Now comes that unavoidable time when you say to anyone who will listen: what the heck am I doing, anyway? If it's a person you love, first you hate only their foulest inadequacies, then you start hating their good points as well. If it's running you love, you start to hate hills, sidewalks, and bad weather, and soon anything that slightly resembles a bump, concrete, or a small breeze. I can't believe I ever said I felt this way, I must have been dreaming! Wait, THIS IS NO DREAM, THIS IS A FILM NOIR MOVIE, and one of those really dark ones, too. I mean, this is love? This is what they tell you about when you're 11 and naive? Or 32 and more naive?
(Love is hard work. And, sometimes, hard work can really hurt.)
Love is a game. If they didn't tell you before, we will tell you now. Love is a game and if you play you either win, lose, or get ejected before the game is over. There are no ties. Maybe you'll lose and learn some great meaningful answer from it all (like if it looks too good to be true, it is). It's easy to love something when you don't have to work at it. It's harder when it asks something of you, you just might be afraid to give. GIVE IT ANYWAY. The heart is the most resilient muscle. It is also the stupidest. So if this love you've found is good to you, hold it, keep it, shout about it. If it isn't, then maybe you should just become very good friends.
(Also known as the big whopperdoodle, or,
the most important part of this whole darn thing.)
So this is love, as demanding and nourishing and difficult as it can be, and as strong and wise as it makes you become. There is something to be gained from commitment. There are rewards for staying when you would rather leave. And there is something to be said for running up that hill when you would rather slide down it. And so you let love come perch upon your shoulder. And you do not turn it away. You do the tango.
Just do it.
Check out the original ad here.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Most of us have had the experience of using a video-on-demand site to watch a movie online. And although many of the on-demand companies offer a variety of films, most of them are very limited when it comes to independent lesbian films.
BuskFilms is a new video-on-demand site showcasing the best in Independent Lesbian short films, full length features and documentaries from around the world.
Buskfilms founder and CEO, Andrea Wing, recently stated in a online interview that she hopes independent lesbian and queer films, which often disappear after gay film festivals, will be available on demand through Buskfilms.
“A few years ago I was online looking for quality lesbian content and there wasn’t anything available that was easy to find,” Wing said.
“I was on YouTube a lot of the time and that is quite limiting in what it offers. As a filmmaker and also a film festival-goer, I knew there was a lot more indie film out there I couldn’t find access to."
“Thus began a process of figuring out how to build a platform to find this and to cost effectively deliver it as well.”
Buskfilms prides itself on the way it is designed to give a proportion of it's download revenue directly back to the film maker.
“Coming from a filmmaking background myself, the point is to put money back into pockets of the filmmakers and by doing that we hope, or we know, that once filmmakers make money off projects, more projects are made and that’s the point of it all,” says Wing.
“The good thing about the lesbian filmmaking community is that it’s such a tight-knit community, so if one filmmaker has their film on the site and realises some benefits from this, often they’ll speak to their friends and colleagues. We’re hoping it will bring in more films and attract more filmmakers.”
Buskfilms works like most on-demand movie sites. It is divided into several categories: Action/Adventure, Busk Picks, Cmedy, Documentary, Drama, and Sci fi/Fantasy. You simply click on a movie that looks interesting, then you can read a short synopsis, or watch a trailer. If you decide to watch the film, you can download it for a minimal fee, with most films costing about $1.99 to $3.99 US dollars.
While Wing and her business partners are presently focusing on lesbian films, there is plenty of room for expansion to include gay films at a later date. “We really wanted to specialise coming out of the gate, but we deliberately chose an androgynous name, so we can bring in the boys later.”
To check out the site for yourself, visit http://www.buskfilms.com/.
Friday, February 18, 2011
By Tim Millett, Guest Blogger
Fun is fun, and scary is scary. In any relationship, there are thresholds that need to be respected. Adult toys can be scary to those not used to them, and if you’re looking for a great way to trash a relationship in seconds, scaring someone is definitely the way to go. It can be an absolute disaster, and any ideas need to be carefully considered before getting into this zone.
The risk factors
Most people have some level of “no go” areas, often linked to serious emotional issues. Traumatic experiences can go back a long way, and a person having a history of difficult or even dangerous relationships is always hyper sensitive, with good reason.
These situations should be considered to be like serious injuries. Even if the wounds have healed, stress leaves scars, and nobody appreciates those scars being reopened. Sexual stress is sometimes severe, and practically reflexive in many people. It’s automatic, and can be very like “fight or flight” responses in crises, similar to shock.
Some subjects can be a case of pushing far too many wrong buttons all at the same time, and if you’re in the early stages of any sort of relationship, it’s usually fatal. Even with an established relationship, exploration of some subjects can be risky. One of the worst possible mistakes in any relationship, on any subject, is not to sound out the issues in advance. If it’s anything to do with sex, expect trouble if you don’t.
Developing relationships do just that- They evolve, and levels of intimacy expand the relationship naturally. This process is reliable, honest, and can be a lot of fun. Anything which doesn’t fit those criteria, forget it.
Talk saves tears
The best way to approach any subject where you’re not sure of your ground is indirectly. You can safely talk about any subject provided the conversation doesn’t get into “This means you” mode. Even this way of doing things can trigger reactions in sensitive people, so be prepared for some fireworks, if you hit a nerve.
Even a comparatively simple, innocuous subject like a vibrator can be an issue for some people, if you’re talking about sex. If so, think about how difficult it would be to turn a vibrator into an emotional or traumatic issue. You can assume something which would have voided the warranty was involved, and that, let’s face it, is a pretty good reason for getting hypersensitive.
More complex issues have an escalating level of difficulty. Don’t assume anything is naturally OK, until you check it out.
Do not underestimate the degree of difficulty for your partner. If you’re not sure how to approach the subject, leave it alone. Nothing good can come of a flat-footed approach to something which puts someone into major reaction mode.
Stay focused on the relationship, stay focused on getting your facts straight when it comes to feelings about sex, and you’ll have a great relationship. Sex is a key component of relationships, and if you wreck it, you wreck the relationship as well. Stick to fun, and life is good.
Author Bio: Tim is an Australian freelance writer and journalist. He writes extensively in Australia, Canada, Europe, and the US. He’s published more than 500 articles about various topics, including adult toys and vibrator.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Her HRC San Francisco
Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice
One Celebration. One Weekend. For Women.
Doors open at 6:00 p.m.
508 4th Street
San Francisco, CA 94107
Join HRC for a sizzling hot women's night filled with sugar and spice and everything nice. You will not want to miss this night! They will be featuring Twilight Vixen Revue, an all queer burlesque troupe and winners of the "Best Burlesque Act in the Bay Area," four years in a row (2007-2010).
Give her a night out and an HRC annual Membership for just $10.
Tickets: $10 online and $15 at the door. Includes an annual HRC membership
Space is limited, arrive early - this event is expected to reach capacity.
Meet US at San Jose Didrion Station at 5:00 p.m. to
take the 5:25 p.m. Bullet up to San Francisco, a 4 block walk to Orsons
The last train back to San Jose leaves at 12:01 and leaves in hourly intervals for an easy return.
Please note your Train Fare will be $17 round trip
RSVP to meet on the train
Please contact email@example.com with questions.
For more information about other Her HRC, please visit www.hrc.org/herhrc.
Calling All Volunteers: if you would like to help at this event or join the Gala Dinner Committee,
email us at firstname.lastname@example.orgFirst Gala Dinner Planning Meeting: February 15, 6:00 p.m.
Friday, February 11, 2011
By Larry James, Relationship Coach & Author
Have you ever wondered how Valentine's Day came to be?
The Story behind St. Valentines Day is a fascinating one. Although February 14th is celebrated as a lovers' holiday today, with the giving of candy, flowers, Valentine's Day card and other gifts between couples in love, it originated as a tribute to St. Valentine, a Catholic bishop.
As early as the fourth century B.C., the Romans engaged in an annual young man's rite of passage to the God Lupercus. It's earliest orgin was the Roman festival Lupercalia, observed on Feb. 15. Lupercalia celebrated the coming of Spring on the Roman calendar. Lupercalia became a celebration intended to ensure the fertility of flocks, fields and people.
The names of the teenage women were placed in a box and drawn at random by adolescent men; thus, a man was assigned a woman companion (a sexual partner) for the duration of the year, after which another lottery was staged. After eight hundred years of this cruel practice, the early church fathers sought to end this practice.
In an effort to do away with the pagan festival, Pope Gelasius ordered a slight change in the lottery. Instead of the names of young women, the box would contain the names of saints. Both men and women were allowed to draw from the box, and the game was to emulate the ways of the saint they drew during the rest of the year. Needless to say, many of the young Roman men were not too pleased with the rule changes.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Lee County Sheriff Jay Jones says, “The arrest that took place was a result of a law enforcement officer actively and presently observing what he at that moment in time perceived to be a violation of the law.” However, the witnesses agree that the fight was already over by the time any law enforcement arrived, so the officer actually observed no crime.
Alabama’s state hate crimes legislation does not include sexual orientation or gender identity as a protected class, and this isn't the first time that the law officials have overlooked these type of hate crimes.
Below is the news clip from this incident, it is definitely worth taking a look at.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Congratulations goes out to JuiceyJessofMFC, she is the winner of the Valentine's Day Lesbian Sex Toy Contest. JuiceyJess will be receiving a MELT Chocolate Body Fondue Kit from mypleasure.com, just in time for Valentine's Day.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
A federal lawsuit was filed Friday in Minneapolis on behalf of two openly lesbian members of Champlin Park High School's Snow Days royalty who want to walk into a pep fest on Monday as a couple.
The lawsuit is just another development in a controversy that was sparked by the school's decision to change their tradition of having the 24 members of student royalty walk in as couples, (boys with girls). Now, the students will walk individually, accompanied by a parent, teacher or other adult mentor.
The students at the center of this issue, 18 year old seniors Desiree Shelton and Sarah Lindstrom, did not initiate the lawsuit. It was filed on Friday in the U.S. District Court in Minneapolis on their behalf by representatives of the Southern Poverty Law Center, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, and the Faegre & Benson law firm.
A district spokeswoman said the Champlin Park High School principal didn't want the young women to walk in together because he feared they would be teased, but the lawsuit said denying them that opportunity was discrimination and an infringement of their First Amendment rights.
Anoka-Hennepin School District officials said the decision was made to stress that students should be honored as individuals, and not by sexual preference. Champlin Park Principal Michael George made the call earlier this week after speaking with district officials, said district spokeswoman Mary Olson.
Olson said the feeling behind the decision was "just that this would be more comfortable for everyone.
"We believe we have come up with a better practice that is more tolerate and acceptable to all students," Olson said, adding that the traditional method assumed students were heterosexual while the new system makes no assumptions at all.
Sam Wolfe, a lawyer for the Southern Poverty Law Center, said that wasn't good enough. "The intent is really clear," he said. "The district does not want the same-sex couple walking in together." However, walking into together was precisely why Shelton and Lindstrom campaigned to be elected by their peers in the first place. "Their intention was to make a political and public statement about gender roles" and lesbian and gay students, the lawsuit said.
Mary Bauer, legal director of the Southern Poverty Law Center, one of the groups that brought the lawsuit, said, "It's kind of astonishing that two girls walking together is so shameful and terrible for other people to witness" that the event would be altered.
A mediation session had been set for Saturday morning. If that fails, a court hearing was scheduled for 8:30 a.m. Monday. The pep rally is set for 1:30 p.m.
Friday, January 21, 2011
I read this article today on the Philadelphia Gay News website and thought I would share it.
"A local gay man is alleging that several Philadelphia police officers used excessive force against him and his partner, as well as homophobic and racist language.
Following a run-in late last month with police, Luis Berrios filed a complaint with the Internal Affairs Bureau Dec. 30, and again on Jan. 13 when department officials said they hadn’t received it, as well as with the Police Advisory Commission Jan. 14.
The PAC serves as the civil oversight committee for the police department.
PAC deputy director Kelvyn Anderson confirmed that the agency received Berrios’ complaint, but formal action has not yet been taken.
Berrios, who lives on the 4500 block of North Seventh Street in Hunting Park, said a neighbor called police in the early morning of Dec. 28 after he and partner Jason Mendez got into an altercation.
When police arrived, Berrios said he asked the officers to take his partner home and that he didn’t want to press charges.
“We’ve been together for two years and I’d never seen him like that. I told the police he needed time to sober up, and one of the officers assured me that they’d take him home and it’d be OK,” Berrios said.
Four officers initially arrived, and Berrios said he first told them that Mendez was his brother so as to avoid any potential awkwardness, but Mendez told police the truth.
Berrios said he walked into the kitchen when he heard Mendez yelling, “Babe, they’re beating me up,” and returned to see his partner in handcuffs and the officers with their batons drawn.
“I asked what they were doing and the one said that [Mendez] cursed at his partner and he told me to back up,” Berrios said. “They told me to just calm down or that I’d be next.”
Berrios said he went to his back porch and made a phone call and that, on his way back in, he saw the officers taking Mendez out front and heard one of them say, “Once he hits the snow, he’ll calm down.”
He said the officers threw Mendez face-first into a pile of snow, repeatedly calling him “nigger” and “faggot.” He said one of the officers must have called for back-up, as 10-12 officers eventually arrived on the scene.
When Berrios approached and asked the officers to let Mendez up, he said they became confrontational with him.
“I never cursed at them, I never spoke out of line, I didn’t show aggression at all,” he said. “One of them came up and said, ‘Put your hands down’ — I was speaking with my hands because I was excited and emotional — and I asked them to just let me calm down. Jason was in the snow and he was saying he couldn’t breathe and they were just stomping on his ankles and hitting his legs with the batons, calling him faggot. And one of the officers said, ‘If you want to help him, put your hands against the wall, faggot.’”
Berrios said when he complied, the arresting officer, listed in court records as Officer Robert Tavarez, handcuffed him. He said the officer attempted to push him in the snow also, but he resisted, and Tavarez instead pushed him against the police car.
“I don’t know what he did with the baton but it felt like he put it between the cuffs and just started twisting it back the opposite way,” Berrios said. “I kept telling him how much it was hurting and he just said, ‘Shut up, pussy faggot.’ I closed my eyes and all I could hear was Jason screaming. And I told him I have a dislocated wrist, and he said, ‘Shut the fuck up, or you’ll have a broken wrist.’ He said, ‘Let me hear you squeal, faggot.’
“And I just started screaming in pain and telling them to just take me, to just put me in jail if they wanted to, so he’d stop. I begged the other officers to make him stop and my neighbor was standing there crying because she knew she couldn’t do anything. I was crying and finally just started banging my head against the windshield to try to knock myself out because I was in so much pain.”
During this time, Berrios said he could see that at least two officers had placed Mendez in the back of one of the cars and were hitting him with their batons. He said his neighbor later told him they took Mendez out of the car and put him back on the ground and attempted to pick him up by the back of his shirt and pants and throw him into the back of a police wagon but missed on the first try, causing him to fall face-first onto the ground.
Berrios said neither he nor his partner was read their Miranda rights.
Once he was in the car, Berrios said another officer came to the car and said there had been “paparazzi” — neighbors taking video and photos of the incident.
“He was asking who was going to take the fall for this,” Berrios said. “He asked who they could blame it on because they had paparazzi out there. And he said he was just going to write that [Mendez] struck him, and I was trying to ask how they can say that happened when he was in handcuffs and shackles. But they said they’d follow the one officer’s report in the other car and then give it to them to look it over and write their report based on that.”
When the pair arrived at the 25th District, Berrios said Mendez was transported to Episcopal Hospital by police.
He said Mendez was bruised “from head to toe,” had deep scratches all over his body, about 15 nail marks around this throat and a cut-open mouth, as well as large patches of hair that had been ripped out. Berrios later sought medical attention for frequent swelling and numbness in his hands.
Berrios was ultimately charged with simple assault, recklessly endangering another person and possession of an instrument of crime with intent — during the altercation with his partner, Berrios said he struck him with a clothes iron because Mendez was pinning him down and did not realize he was having an asthma attack.
Mendez faces charges of simple assault, aggravated assault and recklessly endangering another person.
Berrios said both he and Mendez told officers they did not want to press charges against one another, but police spokesperson Lt. Ray Evers said that, in domestic-violence cases, state law permits charges to be brought if injuries are sustained, with or without the consent of the injured parties.
A neighbor bailed Berrios out the next day, while Mendez remains in custody at the Curran-Fromhold Correctional Facility. Mendez was arrested last year for drug charges and was on two years’ probation, and a judge placed a detainer following his arrest.
Berrios is also on two years’ probation for a retail-theft charge in Delaware County.
PAC deputy director Anderson could not give a timeline on when action may be taken on the case, but said it will first be evaluated by the organization’s executive director, as well as during a hearing by its Investigative Review Committee.
Evers said that, when complaints are filed with the PAC and Internal Affairs, a notification is placed on the files of the officers involved until a determination of potential wrongdoing is made.
Berrios faces a hearing in his case on Jan. 27, and Mendez the following day."
Article written by Jen Colletta, she can be reached at email@example.com.
Friday, January 14, 2011
No, I am not making this stuff up, this is really a trailer for the upcoming film called, "Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same," directed by Madeleine Olnek.
Described by Sundance as “a witty, wholly original comedy," the film is about the adventures of lesbian space aliens on the planet Earth, and the story of the romance between Jane, a shy greeting card store employee, and Zoinx, the woman Jane does not realize is from outer space. Meanwhile, two government agents, or 'Men In Black, ' are closely tracking Jane and the aliens while harboring their own secrets. Sundance promises it features “fetching extraterrestrials” in their “search for romance on the New York lesbian dating scene.” “Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same” will have its world premiere on January 24, 2011, 11:30PM at the Sundance Film Festival (Park City at Midnight section). For tickets go to http://festival.sundance.org/2011/boxoffice..
The film was written and directed by Madeleine Olnek, a downtown New York City playwright/director whose edgy comedies regularly attract sell-out audiences. Newsday has called Olnekʼs work “Uproariously Neurotic Comedy.” Olnek is also one of the authors of the popular acting technique book, A Practical Handbook for the Actor (foreword by David Mamet). The William Goldman Screenwriting Fellow at Columbia University; her work was recognized there with the “Adrienne Shelley Award for Best Female Director.” Her two Sundance shorts “Hold Up” (online at logo.com), and “Countertransference” (to be presented again by Sundance, part of the “Sundance Classics” online during this years festival).
“Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same” stars Susan Ziegler as “Zoinx,” and actor/writer Lisa Haas ("Dyke Dollar" and GO Magazine's 100 Women We Love Class of 2009) as “Jane.” It also stars out comedienne Jackie Monahan (winner of the prestigious "Joke of the Year" from Time Out New York, "Hot Gay Comics" on HERE TV and "One Night Stand" on LOGO), writer/performer Cynthia Kaplan (“Why I’m Like this”) and Rae C Wright; and features stellar performances by Alex Karpovsky ("Tiny Furniture," "Beeswax") and Dennis Davis (“Hold Up”) as the government agents who are following Jane and Zoinx’s romance. Most of the actors are part of an informal “stock company” and have appeared in many of Olnek’s plays and films.
Press and Industry Screening: Wednesday, January 26, 7:30 p.m. Holiday Village Cinema II, Park City; Festival Screenings: Monday, January 24, 11:30 p.m. Library Center Theatre, Park City; Tuesday, January 25, 3:00 p.m. Redstone Cinemas 8, Park City; Thursday, January 27, 6:00 p.m. Tower Theatre, SLC; Saturday, January 29, midnight Yarrow Hotel Theatre, Park City.
The official website of the festival is http://festival.sundance.org/2011/.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
This month’s lesbian sex toy review is all about the Ultimate Exciter. This purple clitoral vibrator has 9 setting with a variety of speeds, pulses and vibrations. It has a long handle with an angled, hallowed out, tip that is designed to cradle your clit perfectly. It even has smooth rubber-like nibs around the tip, for extra sensation.
One of the best parts of this vibrator is the long thin handle, which is perfect for slipping between you and your partner while having sex. Of course you can also use if for solo play, and you will have much less of a reach than your average vibrator.
Another benefit of this vibe is that the velvety skin not only smooth to the touch, but also waterproof, so you can add a little fun to your shower or bath.
Each of the 9 settings on this vibrator are a little different, so you’re bound to find at least one that you like. It starts with a low constant vibration and goes up to a high vibration with different length pulses, you just cycle through with a push of a button.
Dimensions: 7-1/2" x 1-1/4" (widest part of tip)
Batteries: Two AAA Batteries (not included)
If you would like to check it out for yourself, you can find the Ultimate Exciter at mypleasure.com.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Last week the Ohio Court of Appeals ruled that a gay man who had donated sperm to a lesbian couple for the purpose of having a baby and subsequently sought a declaration of paternity, was obligated to pay child support.
Domestic partners Laura Prince and Vicki Griffin had asked their gay friend Curtis to donate sperm so they could have a baby. After some resistance, Curtis did agree, and a child was born to Laura Prince in July 2002. The lesbian couple and the sperm donor had signed a written agreement providing that the donor's name would not appear on the birth certificate and he would not be designated as the father, but that he could babysit the child from time-to-time.
After the birth of the child, Curtis instituted an administrative proceeding before the local Child Support Enforcement Agency to determine his paternity. And in November of 2002, an administrative paternity determination that he was the father was issued. Several months later, the agency ordered Curtis to pay child support of $282.56 per month, but he successfully appealed to a trial court, which found that the mothers had waived the support. That court’s records also showed that Curtis had sought an order for parenting time with the child, but was told he would have to file a separate motion on that issue, which he never did.
Curtis subsequently moved from Ohio to Florida, where he currently lives. Prince, later decided that she needs child support for her baby, and so the Summit County agency filed an administrative action seeking child support on her behalf in December 2008. A magistrate who heard the case in April 2009, with both Curtis and Prince appearing without lawyers, rejected Curtis’ argument that as a sperm donor he should not be held liable for child support. And consequently was ordered to pay $533.22 a month.
Curtis then attained an attorney and tried to appeal the support through a trial court. And after much back and forth from a trails court to an appeals court, Judge Moore of the appeals court stated that, “Any challenge regarding artificial insemination should have been raised at that time.” Having failed to do that in 2003 precluded Curtis, six years later, from mounting that defense against a child support claim.
So, Curtis will be responsible to pay the child support, $533.22 a month, to Prince, and this ruling is enforceable in Florida.